Feelings, Emotions, Change, and Time.

So i've realized im in a very turbulent point in my life. i have been very sensitive to my feelings and emotions and thoughts and ideas, way more than normal... but i realized today that im changing. Im becoming a different person, i can almost see the changes in the way i think and feel, im growing, and its not a bad thing. when i look back at some of my emotional outbursts and turmoil i see them as a kind of growing pain, or like if im metal, its the hammer pounding me into the shape i need to be. i can only really give God the credit, throughout all of this i've been a lot of things i haven't wanted to be... ive done and said and thought things i haven't wanted to... but i realize now that all of it, was for a purpose, i am a bit stronger... a bit more secure... i am NO WHERE near what i want yet... but now that i realize what all this pain is for... i can work through it better... and not let it effect those around me as much. in my mind i see this lump of raw metal being slightly heated and hammered into shape... continuous hammering... and i look back and see every single blow, and when i thought i'd break, when i thought it was too hard... it obviously wasn't... cause the hammering continued... and i didn't break... but where rough un-polished metal once was... is now a smooth shinning surface. with this all in mind i can look forward to the future, and not be scared, or worried or anxious that only more pain is yet to come... but that i am going to be so much more the person i strive to be. so i take heart in that, this by no means means that i am not going to complain when i am being beaten into shape... the metal still growns under the weight of the hammer... but i now have something to keep my eye on... so i wont loose heart, and give up.

thanks.